CIVIL WAR JOURNAL OF JAMES B. LOCKNEY
WIS. 28th REGMT., CO. G
Letters and "Stray Thoughts"
Copyright © 1986, 1997-2020 [James R. Shirey]. All rights reserved.
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[This first letter was furnished by Beckie Kemmerer Daniels via Ancestry.com on 16 Jan 2020.
Her grandparents had been friends with Ira and Ida Lockney (Ira was the son of James B Lockney
and Helen Barnes).
I have gotten permission from Becky to publish this letter between Barnes siblings. The addressee would be the future wife of James Lockney.]
Letter addressed to Miss Hellen M Barnes, Evansville, Rock Co, Wisconsin.
Pine Bluff, Ark
Dear Sister,
[The remaining letters and thoughts are of James B Lockney]
In camp Pine Bluff, Arkansas Some of My Own Thoughts. [Jan. 28, 1865] One evening lately, I was standing in the
ranks for roll call, & as I gazed on the new Moon that was slowly sinking
in the West, I thought of the noted & stirring words which Gen. Bonaparte
addressed to his troops before one of his fights with the Mamalukes near the
great Pyramids in Egypt: “Twenty centuries look down upon you.” The
object of his words was to fire them as was his wont with such an enthusiasm
& courage as would render his arms invincible & victorious. The
result was such as he desired, the effect of his words was felt by all his
soldiers, & the evidences of the works of antiquity were impressive though
silent witnesses of their valor. I have often entertained the thought How
forgetful is man of the great & wonderful witnesses of all his acts, words,
& thoughts. Besides the truism that ‘God is everywhere’ what venerable
spectators always surround us in the darkest night as well as during the
brightest day. In daytime the air is ever present & constantly acts
as a testimony against us when we transgress His high law, & also at night
this wonderful agent is ever nigh. By day & by night, either the Sun
or Moon & stars watch us from their distant seats as silent but ever
present watchers of the most High God, & who may guess but that on some of
those distant outposts of the vast creation may be stationed some recording
Angel who executes the will of his high lord & notes our deeds of merit or
demerit as our acts deserve! [Feb 14, 1865] How strange the thoughts that crowd into a
war farer’s mind when he gazes for the first time on scenes that for so long a
time were invested with so great an interest, so universally felt as that of
Vicksburg!! While for so many long months it yet was held by the rebel
foe, & so as if with the Hey of Fate locked the tide of The Father of
Waters as it rushed from northern lake & river to mingle with the warm
waters of Gulf, the clear & icy waters of the land where school boy slides
gleefully over the glassy ice & the school girl—his sister or playmate,
mounts the huge snow drift on her way to the district school on the bright
frosty winter morning. But now how changed is all this! Instead of
Rebel rags waving defiantly on the morning breeze, now floats our loved Starry
banner, firm in its hold as the foundations of the earth, & sure to be
kissed on high by the breeze & to have its bright stars gilded & made
as the breezes blow and sunrise follows sunrise!! The cannons that once
howled Death to Liberty & Union & Peace, hold now as high & a
stronger place than ever, & though silent, are still eloquent orators in
defense of Truth & Right & Justice to all!! How little are we apt
to realize the great privileges of living at such a time as this, when all may
act the heroic part of high & noblest duty bravely done, & this in
defense of principles as pure & high, & privileges as valuable as any
that man ever employed or
desired.
The Court House is the first prominent objects that is seen & at first
in going round the bend you fear you may not approach nearer than many miles of
it, but when the bend in rounded, the landing is found directly beneath
it. The bluffs are so high & steep as to afford better opportunities
than any place I ever before saw & as they rise very near the waters edge.
The range is very short & 3 or four tiers of guns & works might
be made in the face of the hill. The courthouse presents an imposing
appearance at a distance, but some of the boys who were at it say it looks old
& decayed. Streets seem to be very narrow. Lieut. & Adj.
Eldridge, formerly of Co. B. but now in a Col. Regt. came aboard of the boat Stray Thoughts How much are we all liable to be influenced
by vanity & in what a great variety of ways does this trait of human
character show itself. I for the second time since I came south have been till
this day, much in need of a hat having failed when at Mobile to get a size to
fit me. The time when ai had such need before was in the fall of 1863 at Little
Rock. To most of our boys, the appearance I presented was a matter of Humorous
remark, though a few times a few when under the influence of drink, acted in an
abusive manner toward me. I have forgiven & may soon forget those things.
This A.M. I borrowed Daugherty's hat for an hour to go to the river bank hoping
I might find a hat to suit me, which I might buy. I met R. D. Lewis in my
rambles & each of us bought a hat for $2.00. This was the first white hat I
ever had & he said it becomes me very well. Great was the surprise when we
reached camp & many were the expressions of satisfaction in Co. B. as well
as n our own Co. at the change wrought in my appearance. Notwithstanding all
the harshness that we sometimes meet there is yet good nature in every breast.
Clarksville, Texas No. 22 June 25th 1865 Here one sees much of what books are filled
with life in its severest & least winsome aspects. 'Tis the Sabbath day,
but how little is it like the Sabbath of Christian people wherever Christ is
followed in spirit & in truth and yet very many here are professing
believes in the ways & teachings of the lamb. Some are busy at their
trafficing some build shanties for traffic & thus is passed the weary day.
Many long for home where others still more impatiently doubt if the time for
our return--so long delayed will ever come!! Stray Thoughts Long ago I heard it said that 'Gray Hairs
were an honor to a man', but I learned by personal observations that his was
true only in some cases, & that in many instances they are but the sure
& true, though silent witnesses of dishonor, shame & transgression. I
often thought of this & now I have daily before me a sad specimen of this
kind. A fellow soldier in Co. __ more than 50 years old--of much more than
ordinary natural ability, having a good memory so that he is rich in anecdote,
though this is too often of an indecent kind or distorted & incorrect in
detail because of the drink whose effects he has too often felt & the many
hours & days he must have wasted in the soul-destroying stupor of the vile
master in whose service he has so long & willingly lingered. His varied
experiences are worst than last, for his influence is chiefly for evil on young
& old alike. How many such are homeless, childless, & friendless, &
all their earnings too often are devoted to the support of some dram shop or
saloon, till from neglect & exposure he is born to the silent grave that so
few, if any will ever care to visit. Who can tell the various ways that the
progress of the world & the condition of Society are affected by this large
class? How many homes are never organized for which there is such a plenty of
room & such a profusion of means in the world. How many good & faithful
maidens are never wed, & of so many who become the wife of such how little
is ever known of the happiness of a well ordered home except the bright happy
days of bright joy & hope that was experienced in the days of girlhood
& earliest womanhood. Surely there is want & misery & woe in the
world where plenty & joy & peace could abide & were designed to be
by the Creator. Stray Thoughts No.24 Stray Thoughts No. 25 Stray Thoughts No. 26 Stray Thoughts No. 27 last modified
1/21/2020
Mch 6th, 1864
Received your letter yesterday and was glad to hear from you again for nothing does a soldier more good than to have letters from home.
But still I hate to write letters as bad as any body for there is not much of any thing to write.
We are having very fine weather. The fleet arrived from below some two or three weeks ago. Two of the boats struck a snag a few miles
below here and sunk one was the Gun boat No [or N.] 10. They saved all her guns and other fixings. The other boat they unloaded and
raised her and brought her up here and are now repairing her. The river was quite low when they came up so part of them unloaded here
and the rest went up to the Rock. They took the flour off here and took the hardtack up to the Rock so that now we draw full rations
of flour which when made up into bread (as Mall used to say) aint very bad to take. We trade our bacon off for fresh meat and take it
all together we live pretty well for soldiers. The boys are well the most of them. We have had some new recruits lately and they don’t
stand it very well. Several of them are in the Hospital already. We had general Inspection yesterday. Maj White of our Regt is
Inspector Gen for our Division and the Regt which passes the [__?_] Inspection are to have new guns. I expect our Regt will get them.
I expect that we shall start for the Red river county Texas before long. I suppose that is what the Inspection was for to see if the
Regt was in fighting [trim?]. We shall probably not start for Texas [__?_] of a month or six weeks. I don’t expect there will be much
left of the Rebs this side of the Mississippi by next fall and I am in hopes there won’t be many left other side either.
Well to day is Sunday. I expect the church bells are ringing where you are and I guess there is one ringing here but I can’t hear it
for it is so small that it can’t be heard much farther than a good sized cow bell. It is on the Catholic Church. Some of the boys are
going to church. I have not been to Church in almost a year and I don’t think I shall go again until I get back to Wis. I don’t know
what has become of old Tiffany and don’t know as I care. He was not dead the last that I heard of him. You don’t seem to like the
Niggars very well I am very sure I don’t and I would not care if they were all dumped into the Gulf of Mexico. It would be very
little loss to community.
Well the boats are going down the river in about an hour so close this letter and get into the mail in time to go if I can.
From Your Bro
H D Barnes
Friday Night, December 4th 1863.
As the sports in Camp are of such a character that I very seldom join in them
& the subjects of conversation are often of a very low & vulgar sort, I
very often, in fact nearly all the time have thoughts of the past and some of
the present time with which most of my fellow soldiers have very little
sympathy. This evening Gilbert & myself took a walk about the town, and as
usual with us when together, our thoughts were heavy & our talk serious,
chiefly about the scarcity of high aims & good principles in the army &
in the World. When we returned to camp it was nearly dark and my thoughts
turned on my own condition in the World, & my relations to my fellow beings
and chiefly to the fact that though in my 27th year, still I do not
know who may be the future partner of my life's Joys and sorrows, and who may
be the object of my most devoted love and anxious care and solicitude. In fact
no very definite idea exists in my mind as to who that person may be. This is
so very important a matter as very naturally to be an object of very deep
solicitude to me, as I think it should be to every right minded person of
either sex in the world who has reached mature age.
Long ago when attending school in the old log schoolhouse, in the winter I
think of 1852-3 when in my eighteenth year a little girl of clear bright eye,
well formed features and in general at that time of a lovable way, for she then
had a love for her Teacher and a will and ability well & rapidly to learn
any lesson that was set before her, for she excelled in spelling as she had a
good memory, and as whispering was a very common habit, but from which I
conscientiously abstained, one day she used some such an expression, with an
assumed boldness as that I was her "old man", for very many thought
it was very like an old man so strictly to abstain from the common
transgressions of the schoolroom. I know she loved me though then in her
twelfth year and young as she was the idea might have gleamed in her mind that
at some time in the future I might be the one most dear to her for all her
mature life. But ere the end of five short years during which time she
continued to attend school & I had began to teach school, very grave
differences of opinion and consequently of action & influence arose which
formed an impossible barrier between us that could never be removed. Owing to
the lack of proper influences at home she became insubordinate in school, and
her strength of will was developed but not her kind and gentle way, which
should always form one of the chief charms of every woman especially a young
girl & maiden.
That same winter I happened to see for the first time a young girl in her
thirteenth year who was so very different from all those by whom I was
surrounded that I was very sensibly impressed with a sense of her superiority
over all with whom I had ever been acquainted. Her expression of countenance,
her whole demeaner was self restrained and of a sort of majestic quietness,
mingled with a very apparent thoughtfulness and refinement which was at once
commanding for all one's respect, and prepossessing by its majestic grandeur
rather than for her warm glowing beauty and physical loveliness. Her personal
appearance as regards size of person and outline of feature was then good, and
I have since seen it ripen into a state of womanhood, fulfilling in every
respect, the promise of early years except perhaps brilliancy of address, but
this is rather proper and strictly decorous than fascinating. Her opinions of
which I can judge quite accurately and her conduct also being strictly proper
& unexceptional, are very much in accordance with my own, except perhaps
some differences of religious opinions, in regard to which she may entertain
some very strong prejudices, but her thoughts must be most serious in regard to
all reasonable opinions entertained in regard to a Life beyond the tomb of
which think she does not entertain a doubt.
Both of those are now in full maturity of womanhood, the first being in her 23rd
year or past it, while the last referred to may be a year older. The first I
think possesses the greatest versatility of talent, as well I think, as the
power of more easily acquiring knowledge, while the latter possesses a more
strict sense of the vast responsibilities of human life, though this I think is
more the result of home influences & training began in early years and
continued till it had taken a firm hold on her mind and thus became a part of
her very being. For this reason her mood is serious and grave, inclined to much
deep thought very extensive and varied reading & I think very deep &
serious meditation on the great questions of human life & duty. Thus her
mind is well stored with varied & useful practical knowledge of the various
ways of life, which gives strength to her mind & sustaining stability to her
principles of virtue & morality. She has experience in the various ways of
female industry, and she is so convinced of its necessity and utility as to
find in labor a great help to health and performs it with pleasure.
The ways of the other are very different in every respect. She being very
deficient in respect for herself, as well as for others. She is not convinced
of the necessity of dilligent labor continuous industry and study nor does she
duly value time as being every moment of most incalculable value. She is not a
dilligent reader of good books nor does she seek every opportunity for the
increase of her store of useful information. Alas! she has acquired the habit
of sitting for hours idle day as well as evening while there is so much to do &
to learn in life. She does not try to cultivate sweetness of temper, and
gentleness of manner, which is so clearly every persons duty and so much the
interest of every girl & woman Especially unlike the other she has no
system in regard to dividing her time between work & study and so finds
much time on her hands with which she does not know what to do, while the other
has plenty of work for her own employment & the advancement of the
interests of her father's home & household. The first neglects & seems
got to realize the vast influence for good & right she could & should
wield over the ways & minds of many younger brothers & sisters at home.
Certain it is that witnesses more worthy of our regard, respect, &
obedience than those decaying works of man’s hands, as senseless as stone &
but made to be man’s servant, call to us daily, nay every hour to so pass our
hours & days that will secure to our souls the joys of endless eternities;
to our minds that cultivation which the better prepares us for the performance
of the duties of life & the fullest enjoyment of its highest
Pleasures; & well as the preservation of the health of our bodies
till a full old age is attained.
No. 21 June 24 [1865]
Clarksville, Texas at mouth of Rio Grande
No. 23 June 26th 1865
Clarksville, Texas
How great & sudden are many of the changes of Life is shown, very
strikingly by the career of Jefferson Davis, late Pres. of the Southern
Confederacy. He is now on trial for treason & perhaps he will be tried for
complicity in the murder of Pres. Lincoln. For many years the leader of the
extreme Southern Party, he achieved a position so conspicuous that at the
outbreak of the rebellion he was chosen Chief of Traitors, chief of the foes of
Freedom & of God. How imperiously & defiantly he used his decrees in
the support of Oppression, & so severely taxed the means & services of
several millions during four long years of such bitterness & pain as were
never known in our land since the dark bitter days of the old times that 'tried
Men's Souls'. In days past many would assert that he was a brave & fearless
man, but this is forever disproved by the fact that he tried to effect his
escape by disguising himself in female attire & allowed his wife to try to
pass him off from his captors as her 'Old Mother'!!! Why did he not form one of
Lee's Army, & in some capacity with his hands help sustain the falling
cause of the Slave masters, & with it surrender or fight to the last bitter
end-- to very death. Certain it is there were many in that band of desperate
& mistakenly devoted men who would continue the fight till scarce one was
left & if brave, why did he not unite his fate with theirs? Thus might he
have made his name immortal, for the world would accept this as proof, at
least, of his sincerity & devotion to a cause that he professed to believe
just & right. Now he occupies a cell prepared for felons, refuses to eat
the common army rations, raves & threatens the guards, & even pretends
to insanity. Many unfeelingly mock at his humiliation, but much as we must
rejoice at this downfall & of his cause, still is he human & we may
pity him while we wish Justice & Right the most complete triumph. June 27th
[1865]
How often a person in the army is afforded an opportunity to compare the joys
& comforts of home with the troubles & difficulties unavoidable while a
soldier. This must be felt most severely by those so numerous in our
ranks, who had pleasant homes of their own which they had enjoyed for many long
years & where they left their wives & families so anxiously & often
with tears, to await their long-delayed return. Even such as I who left
Parents in a humble home am often forced to reflect on the wide difference
between the various advantages & comforts there afforded & the
discomforts from which money will not relieve a soldier while here. How
often must not a fond Father’s dreams be of the fond attentive wife, with whom
his comfort & satisfaction were also leaned as if it were a vast &
immovable tower of support. How his little ones come crowding about his
knees each claiming the place of preferment on his knee which he at last
decides belongs to the weakest & youngest. Those memories of past
joys often haven’t[?] his reveries while the sun shines as well as dreams in
the still hour of midnight.
How often are the reveries of those who as yet have no families awaiting them
filled with fond pleasant fancies of what might have been!! How clearly I
remember my fancies one night when on Picket at Pine Bluff when sitting quietly
on post my thoughts wandered back to the days of 1857 when I had so favorable
an opportunity to wed one who would in every respect more than fulfill my
heartiest wishes. I thought how joyous it would be to have her welcome me
with outstretched arms as well as to stoop to raise one or more little cherubs
to my lips to taste the sweet kiss of their parental affection from their
innocent warm lips. But by neglect & delay, or rather the absence of
a realization of the value of the prize the ease with which it might be
secured, she was wooed & won by one not worthy of her varied powers, her
youth & loveliness & devotion, & thus doomed to a life where want
may grow & neglect may sting one possessed of very many high traits of
character & of very fine sensibilities. Thus am I yet left to muse
& regret the greater joys & pleasures that might have been!!
Mouth of the Rio Grand, June 28th [1865]
How sad it is that the loveliest persons in the world are like all things else
doomed to enter the dark & noisome grave. It seems not so much
surprising that the aged who may be tired & weary of Life’s long way feel
willing to take rest in an abode so uninviting nor that the innocent little
people who die young should feel no repugnance to give up a state of whose
conditions they know not, neither of its joys & bliss nor yet of its deep
dark sins & sorrows. But that the young & the lovely & the
brave, having reached the time of usefulness, prepared alike for Life’s labors
& joys with ready hand & willing mind, all powers qualified for most
efficient & pleasant action—that at once a fabric as skillfully &
gracefully formed should so alive & warm with noble activities so full of
kind tenderness on the one hand united to a devotion that does not realize the
existence of bounds to the unselfish good she may accomplish & on the
other, an enterprise & comage that defies all danger & despised all opposition
for such to be grasped in the icy hand of Death & doomed to become the food
of worms & to waste away beyond our reach or sympathy. This is truly
sad, yet inevitable.
Clarksville Texas June 27th 1865
One of the weaknesses of Human Nature as shown in hero worship is clearly
indicated by the prominence given to that habit of smoking cigars to which it
is said Gen. U.S. Grant is invetuately addicted. I could not help
noticing this while reading an article lately that very much interested me, but
as I have often felt the useless expense, disgusting filthiness, & various
inconveniences caused by this very disagreeable & almost universal use of
tobacco in some ways could not help noticing the too frequent mention of the
cigar in connection often with the momentous results of the greatest Battles of
the War. It must be evident that the use of this noxious weed
becomes more general every year, & the fear may well be entertained that it
will ere long become very nearly universal among males, unless some very
improbable reaction soon takes place. If our Lieut. Gray be
so sadly the slave of so debasing a habit his misfortune should be regretted by
every rightminded person, & especially by his true friends. Instead
of this the fault is paraded as if it were really a virtue, & as if
sensible people could be persuaded that the poisonous narcotic had a virtue
[having] a strange power which they had always denied or never know, certainly
no influence should be given to the still greater development of this habit
among the youth of this or other lands, for how large is the multitude who
waste tenfold what would afford a competence for the wintry days of Old Age,
for this show how we are yet tainted with that punicious partiality for the
faults of great Men which is akin to the Old Idea that the ‘King can do no
wrong’ or rather that all he does is right. June 30, 1865